"The Super Cosmos Church believes that there are too many barriers to spiritual fulfillment and peace. Why spend years in theology seminar or a monastery? This is the internet age - years of religious study are just a click away. Get ordained now! Perform weddings, funerals, get the best parking spaces, wear a cassock, comfort horny widows, scare children, cast curses, absolve sins, and make people feel better about their life by quoting from any one of dozens of hocus pocus old texts!" - Minister in Minutes